I was a klutzy kid growing up, but that was just bruises and smacking things and cuts and scrapes. How did you get brain lesions? Just hitting your head that hard? O.o

My dad is the always-injured person in our family. He fell off the roof, he stuck his hand in a snowblower, he put cold sore medicine directly on his eyeball thinking it was his prescription for pink eye ...

Okay that's not entirely the same thing, as most of your injuries seem to be unfortunate freakish accidents and not "I'm invincible!!!!"-style reckless stupidity.