fandomhigh_ooc | Meme: Quotes

Spider-Man: But really, if you want to help, the best thing you can do is lay low while I try to clear Cloak's name.
Victor: But… but I have powers! And in that book Webs, your photographer friend said your motto is, 'With great power, there must also come great responsibility.'
Gert: Really? That's inane. Most people in life don't have great power, and the few that do are almost never responsible with it. The people who have the greatest responsibility are the kids with no power, because we're the ones that have to keep everyone else in check.
Spider-Man: Wow. You are totally gonna be an Avenger when you grow up.

"Man, why couldn't my 'rents have given you to me for my Bat Mitzvah, Old Lace? A telepathic velociraptor from the eighty-seventh century would have made middle school a lot more tolerable."

Shepard: So, what are you making? A Canadian delicacy of some sort?
Kaidan: Uh, yes. Exactly. We've got beef, we've got bacon, we've got beer. The foods of my people!

Made extra funny by Shepard's male VO sounding super Canadian on his line...

Edited 2013-03-18 14:30 (UTC)

"Victor, if you have such a man-crush on the spandex crowd, why do you want to murder all of them when you grow up?"

"I reserve the word 'evil' for very few things outside of fat-free ice cream and non-Mac computers."

"He killed your mother, Speak and Spell! I think you can delete the fifth commandment from your morality file!"

Victor: Are you guys those Young Avengers I read about?
Gert: Ick. I should make Old Lace rip your liver out for that. We're not super-heroes, okay?

That One Time DLC Jossed Me:

Joker: So Kaidan, I've never had the nerve to ask.. The hair, man? Is that product or are you just naturally that uh.. whatever that is?
Kaidan: Actually, it's because of static electricity. Biotics build up a charge the same way a ship does during FTL. The L3 implants minimize the effects, but with the L2s, it can be pretty painful.
Joker: Wow. I was just screwing with you. Now I'm that asshole.

Also:

Shepard: Biotics are a little intangible when there's an example of physical excellence standing right in front of you.
James: Nice.
Kaidan: Wow, Shepard, did you really just say that?
Shepard: Don't worry, Kaidan. Your kind of physical excellence is still my kind of physical excellence.

Edited 2013-03-18 15:11 (UTC)

Yeah, okay, part of this one is in my profile code but I love stubborn, desperate, slightly-unhinged Éponine the best so you get (well, most of) the whole scene. Bit of context here: Éponine is waiting outside the garden gate of Valjean's house, where Marius and Cosette are being all lovebirdy in the garden.

Of note: there is some allusion to physical abuse in here.

***

The sixth man, who had not yet spoken, proceeded to examine the gate as Éponine had done an hour before and was not slow to discover the bar loosened by Marius. But as he was about to wrench it aside a hand emerging from the darkness seized him by the arm. He felt himself thrust backward and a husky voice said in a warning undertone, "There's a dog!" The lanky figure of a girl rose up before him.

The man recoiled with the shock of the unexpected. He seemed to bristle, and nothing is more dismaying than the sight of a startled wild animal; their very fright is frightening. He drew back, exclaiming:

"Who the devil are you?"

"Your daughter."

The man was Thénardier.

At this the five other men, Claquesous, Guelemer, Babet, Montparnasse, and Brujon, gathered round them, moving silently, without haste and without speech, in the slow, deliberate manner that is proper to creatures of the night. They were equipped with a variety of sinister implements . . .

"What are you doing here? What do you want? Have you gone crazy?" cried Thénardier, so far as anyone can be said to cry who is keeping his voice low. "Have you come to try and put me off?"

Éponine laughed and flung her arms around his neck.

"I'm here because I'm here, dearest father. Aren't I even allowed to sit down in the street? You're the one who shouldn't be here. What's the use of coming here when it's no good? I told Magnon it was a biscuit. There's nothing to be got here. But you might at least kiss me. It's a long time since we saw each other. So you're out again?"

Thénardier grunted, trying to release himself from her arms:

"That's enough. You've kissed me. Yes, I'm not inside any more. And now, clear out."

But Éponine still clung to him.

"But how did you do it? It was very clever of you to get out. You must tell me how you did it. And mother -- where is she? You must tell me about mother."

"She's all right," said Thénardier. "I don't know where she is. And now, clear out, can't you?"

"But I don't want to go," said Éponine, pouting like a spoilt child. "I haven't seen you for four months, and you want to send me away." And she tightened her grip on him.

"This is getting silly," said Babet.

"Hurry it up," said Guelemer. "The cops'll be along."

Éponine turned to the other men.

"Why, it's Monsieur Brujon! And Monsieur Babet. Good evening, Monsieur Claquesous. Don't you recognize me, Monsieur Guelemer? And how are you, Montparnasse?"

"That's all right, they all know you," said Thénardier. "Well, you've said hallo, and now for God's sake go away and leave us in peace."

"This is a time for foxes, not hens," said MOntparnasse.

"You can see we've got a job to do," said Babet.

Éponine took Montparnasse's hand.

"Careful," he said. "You'll cut yourself. My knife's open."

"Montparnasse, my love," said Éponine very sweetly, "you must learn to trust people. Aren't I my father's daughter? Don't you remember, Monsieur Babet and Monsieur Guelemer, that I was sent to look this place over?"

It is worthy of note that Éponine did not speak a word of argot. Since she had known Marius thieves' slang had become impossible for her. She pressed her thin, bony fingers into Gueulemer's rugged palm and went on:

"You know I'm not stupid. People generally believe me. I've been useful to you more than once. Well, I've found things out, and I swear there's nothing for you here. You'd be running risks for no reason."

"Two women alone," said Gueulemer.

"No. The people have left."

"The candles haven't," said Babet.

And he pointed through the tree-tops to a flickering light in the attic, where Toussaint, staying up later than usual, was hanging out washing to dry.

Éponine made a last effort.

"Anyway, they're very poor, nothing there of any value."

"Go to the devil!" exclaimed Thénardier. "When we've ransacked the house from top to bottom we'll know if there's anything worth having."

He thrust her aside.

"MOntparnasse, you're my friend," said Éponine. "You're a good lad. Don't go in!"

"Watch out you don't cut yourself," said MOntparnasse.

Thénardier spoke with the authority he knew how to assume.

"Off you go, girl, and leave the men to get on with their business."

Éponine let go of Montparnasse's hand and said:

"So you're determined to break in!"

"That's right," said the ventriloquist and chuckled.

"Well, I won't let you," said Éponine.

She stood with her back to the gate, facing the six men, all armed to the teeth and looking like demons in the dark. She went on in a low, resolute voice:

"Listen to me. I mean this. If you try to get into the garden, if you so much as touch this gate, I'll scream the place down. I'll rouse the whole neighbourhood and have the lot of you pinched."

"She will, too," muttered Thénardier to Brujon and the ventriloquist.

Éponine nodded vigorously, adding, "And my father for a start!"

Thénardier moved towards her.

"You keep your distance," she said.

He drew back, furiously muttering, "What's got into her?" and he spat the word at her: "Bitch!"

She laughed derisively.

"Say what you like, you aren't going in. I'm not a dog's daughter but a wolf's. There are six of you, six men and I'm one woman, but I'm not afraid of you. You aren't going to break into this house, because I don't choose to let you. I'm the watchdog, and if you try it I'll bark. So you might as well be on your way. Go anywhere you like, but don't come here. I won't have it."

She took a step toward them, and she was awe-inspiring. She laughed again.

"My God, do you think I'm scared? I'm used to starving in summer and freezing in winter. You poor fools, you think you can frighten any woman because you've got soft little sluts of mistresses who cower under the bedclothes when you talk rough. But I'm not scared." She looked at her father. "Not even of you." With fiery eyes she glared round at the other men. "What do I care if my body's picked up in the street tomorrow morning, beaten to death by my own father -- or found in a year's time in the ditches round Saint-Cloud or the Ile des Cygnes, along with the garbage and the dead dogs?"

She was interrupted by a fit of coughing, a hollow sound that came from the depths of her narrow, sickly chest.

"I've only got to yell, you know, and people will come running. There are six of you, but I'm the public."

Thénardier again made a move towards her. "Keep away!" she criewd. He stopped and said mildly: "All right, I won't come any nearer, but don't talk so loud. My girl, are you trying to prevent me working? After all, we have to earn our living. Have you no more feeling for your father?"

"You sicken me," said Éponine.

"But we've got to eat."

"I don't care if you starve."

Having said which she sat down again on the step, humming the refrain of "Ma grand'mère by Béranger, the most renowned songwriter of the day . . .

She sat with her legs crossed, her elbow on her knee and her chin on her hand, swinging her foot with an air of indifference, the glow of a nearby street-lamp illuminating her posture and her profile. Through the rents in her tattered garment her thin shoulder-blades were to be seen. It would be hard to conceive a picture more determined or more surprising.

***

And it goes on for a bit longer, but basically she just keeps sitting there singing to herself, and they finally just give up and leave.

More later. TOLD YOU THERE WOULD BE WALLS OF TEXT.

Kaidan: Excuse me? I... lost all of my money and I need to get it back!
Guard: We can't do that, sir-- sir-- please don't cry!

Shepard: So, remember how I saved the Citadel? And then-- you weren't there-- I survived a suicide mission? All these close calls I've had, only to be taken out by dinner. ... can it at least be quick and painless?
Kaidan: Funny. And you think I hauled your butt out of the fire all those times just to poison you here, now?
Shepard: I just took down my clone. I got to figure anything's possible.

Kaidan: That was great!
Shepard: Still waiting for the botulism to kick in.
Kaidan: Hey, I thought it was pretty good!
Shepard: Actually, it was pretty good. I'm impressed.
Kaidan: I'm an enigma. I've got skills! I mean, for example, fistfight, me and James? I'd win, right? ... what if I fought dirty?

Edited 2013-03-18 16:16 (UTC)

The explanation for Bay's username:
John: Daphne, it's okay. That's just Bay being Bay.
Bay: What does that mean?
Toby: I think it's a euphemism for another word that starts with "B".

This is the DLC that just keeps on giving...

Liara: Are you ready?
Tali: Well, I need to use the bathroom. And...there. Now I'm ready.
Liara: I was just asking to be polite.
Tali: It's a silly question.
Liara: At least wash your hands afterward.

Merc: That drone is giving me a migraine!
Liara: He belongs to me!
Merc: keep it on a leash!
Liara: Glyph! Lower their morale!
Glyph: Hostiles, your life expectancy has shortened to 15 seconds. 14. 13. 12...

Ann: You have to spend the next week with me and do everything I say.
April: So I have to be your slave or something?
Ann: No. You have to be my friend.
April: No, that's so much worse!

Ann: I guess it would have to be Channing Tatum's body, Ryan Gosling's face, and Michael Fassbender's sense of humor. What about you? Build your perfect guy.
April: Um...Yao Ming's torso, Napoleon's brain, and the Hunchback of Notre Dame's hunchback.

Edited 2013-03-18 15:16 (UTC)

Shepard: That phone call was pretty damning stuff. How'd you get it?
Liara: It involved the weapon's biometric data, salarian intelligence, and a hanar prostitute with camera implants.
Shepard: Seriously?
Liara: No, but the truth is boring.

Wrex: Remember all those years ago on the Citadel, when I asked who'd win in a fight between you and Shepard? Remember how you thought it was a pointless question? Look at us now!
Kaidan: I was really hoping you'd forgotten that.
Wrex: Aah, look on the bright side. In a few minutes, you'll have your answer!

Kaidan: What do we know about these mercenaries?
Shepard: They have guns and don't like me.
Kaidan: Very helpful. Thanks.

Kaidan: So what was it? You fell through the fish tank?
Shepard: We'll talk about it later.
Kaidan: Such a shame. It was one of my favorites.
Shepard: We'll talk about it later!

Kaidan: Did I ever tell you about my casino run-in with 5000 credits, a bottle of whiskey and the vorcha mafia...? ...Actually, never mind.

Tali: Shepard, what do you think your clone is looking for in here?
Shepard: I don't know. Anything's possible.
Liara: Like finding out you have a clone?
Shepard: I don't want to talk about it.

Kaidan: Fighting your own clone? That's not something you'll find in the Spectre handbook.
Javik: But useful! If there is anything you don't want to do, let him handle it.
Brooks: So, like a personal butler?
Shepard: I don't want to talk about it!
Kaidan: So make your clone do it.

Victor: But as long as we're all making amends… why don't you and Gert bury the hatchet?
Gert: Tell Nico she can keep her hatchet!
Nico: Tell Gert I'm holding onto it in case her dinosaur tries to eat me again!
Gert: Tell Nico my dinosaur doesn't like the taste of tarts!
Nico: Tell Gert she looks like she loves the taste of everything!
Gert: Tell Nico if she'd put some meat on her anorexic bones, maybe she wouldn't have to steal other girls' guys!
Nico: Heh.
Gert: Heh.
Nico: BFF?
Gert: WTF.
Victor: What… what just happened?

Victor. SO PERPLEXED by girls.

*hugs my robotboy.*

THEY ARE A CONFUSING SPECIES, TO BE FAIR.

Oh, and then there's this:

Kaidan: I guess we better get back to it.
Shepard: At least we threw one hell of a party. Probably the last one.
Kaidan: Shepard, you will find a way to win. I know it. And when you do, I'll be waiting... Yeah, greatest challenge of my life, and the greatest reward. It's been a good ride.
Shepard: The best.

... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.

*SOBS*

GODDAMNIT, LEN. NOT COOL.

Yeah, apparently I wanted to make myself cry again today.

Dyson: "Look, I'm just a wolf, standing in front of a succubus, asking--"

Bo: *punches him* "A-hole!"

Perhaps you had to be there.

♥ ♥

Liara: Just follow Shepard's lead; let the rest of us do the heavy lifting!
Garrus: Touche, T'Soni!
Shepard: You think all you comedians could start hitting something?

A couple of bits here from the same chapter.

***

Marius sat pondering while he watched her. She drew near to his writing-table.

"Books!" she said.

A light dawned in her clouded eyes. She announced, with the pride in attainment from which none of us is immune: "I know how to read."

Picking up a book that lay open on the table she read, without much difficulty: 'General Bauduin was ordered to seize and occupy, with the five battalions of his brigade, the Château de Hougomont, which is in the middle of the plain of Waterloo...'

She broke off and exclaimed: "Waterloo! I know about that. It's an old battle. My father was there. My father was in the army. We're all real Bonapartists in our family. Waterloo was against the English." She put the book down and took up a pen. "I can write, too." She dipped the pen in the ink and looked at Marius. "You want to see? I'll write something to show you."

Before he could say anything she had written on a blank sheet lying on the table: 'Watch out, the bogies are around.' She laid down the pen. "No spelling mistakes. You can see for yourself. We've had some schooling, my sister and me. We haven't always been what we are now. We weren't brought up to be --"

But here she stopped and gazing with her dulled eyes at Marius she burst out laughing. In a tone in which the extreme of anguish was buried beneath the extreme of cynicism she exclaimed, "What the hell!"

***

"I go off on my own when I feel like it and sleep in a ditch, likely as not. You know, at night when I'm walking along the boulevards the trees look to me like pitchforks, and the houses, they're so tall and black, like the towers of Notre-Dame, and when you come to a strip of white wall it's like a patch of water. And the stars are like street lamps and you'd think they were smoking, and sometimes the wind blows them out and I'm always surprised, as though a horse had come and snorted in my ear; and although it's night-time I think I can hear street-organs and the rattle of looms, all kinds of things. And sometimes I think people are throwing stones at me and I run away and everything goes spinning round me. When you've had nothing to eat it's very queer."

. . . I have no idea how they got "On My Own" out of this one for the musical, I swear.

Edited 2013-03-18 20:32 (UTC)

I AM SPAMMING YOU DEAL WITH IT.

And now I'm just having fun with bits that got adapted for the musical, because some of them are totally different. Mostly because musical!Éponine is, you know, actually sane, but I think less-sane book Éponine is kind of adorable too.

In which Marius is super clueless:

***

Marius still said nothing, and after a moment's pause she exclaimed: "Well, I could make you look happy if I wanted to!"

"How?" said Marius. "What do you mean?"

"You weren't so unfriendly last time."

"I'm sorry. But what do you mean?"

She bit her lip and hesitated as though wrestling with some problem of her own. Finally she seemed to make up her mind. "Oh well, it can't be helped. You look so miserable and I want you to be happy. But you must promise to smile. I want to hear you say, 'Well done!' Poor Monsieur Marius! But you did promise, you know, that you'd give me anything I asked for."

"Yes, yes! But tell me!"

She looked steadily at him. "I've got the address."

Marius had turned pale. His heart seemed to miss a beat. "You mean --"

"The address you wanted me to find out. The young lady -- you know . . ." She spoke the words with a deep sigh.

Marius jumped down from the parapet where he had been sitting and took her by the hand. "You know it? You must take me there. You must tell me where it is. I'll give you anything you ask."

"It's right on the other side of town. I shall have to take you. I don't know the number, but I know the house." She withdrew her hand and said in a tone of sadness that would have wrung the heart of any beholder, but of which Marius in his flurry was quite unconscious: "Oh, how excited you are!"

A thought had struck Marius and he frowned. He seized her by the arm. "You must swear one thing."

"Swear!" And she burst out laughing. "You want me to swear!"

"Your father. You must promise -- Éponine, you must swear to me that you'll never tell him where it is."

She was gazing at him in astonishment. "Éponine! How did you know that was my name?"

"Will you promise me?"

She seemed not to hear. "But it's nice. I'm glad you've called me Éponine."

He grasped her by both arms. "For Heaven's sake, will you answer! Listen to what I'm saying. Swear that you won't pass this address on to your father."

"My father . . ." she repeated. "Oh, him. You needn't worry about him, he's in solitary. Anyway, what do I care about my father."

"But you still haven't promised."

"Well, let me go," she cried, laughing, "instead of shaking me like that! All right, I promise. What difference does it make to me?? I'll say it. I swear I won't tell my father the address. Will that do?"

"Or anyone else?"

"Or anyone else."

"Good," said Marius. "Now take me there."

"This minute?"

"Yes, this minute."

"Well, come along. Heavens," she said, "how delighted you are!" But after they had gone a little way she paused. "You're keeping too close to me, Monsieur Marius. Let me walk on ahead and you must follow as though you didn't know me. It wouldn't do for a respectable young man like you to be seen in company with a woman of my kind."

No words can convey the pathos of that word 'woman,' spoken by that child.

She walked a few paces and then stopped again. Marius caught up with her. She spoke out of the side of her mouth, not looking at him. "By the way, you promised me something?"

Marius felt in his pocket. All he had in the world was the five-franc piece intended for her father. He got it out and thrust it into her hand, and she opened her fingers and let the coin fall to the ground. She looked somberly at him.

"I don't want your money," she said.

Wow, the problem here is that I keep just wanting to type out entire chapters. And it doesn't help that she's babbly. DAMN IT, HUGO.

Fine, I'll just do small bits from this chapter. Which, fair warning, is the one where she dies.

***

She murmured: "The ball passed through my hand, but it came out through my back. It's no use trying to move me. I'll tell you how you can treat my wound better than any surgeon. Sit down on that stone, close beside me."

Marius did so. She rested her head on his knee and said without looking at him: "Oh, what happiness! What bliss! Now I don't feel any pain."

For a moment she was silent, then with an effort she turned to look at Marius.

"You know, Monsieur Marius, it vexed me when you went into that garden. That was silly, because after all I'd shown you the way there, and anyway I should have known that a young gentleman like you --" She broke off, and passing from one unhappy thought to another, said with a touching smile: "You think I'm ugly, don't you?" She went on: "But now you're done for! No one will get out of this place alive. And I'm the one who brought you here! You're going to die. I was expecting it, and yet I put my hand over that musket barrel [...] I've been waiting for you. I thought, 'Won't he ever come?' I had to bite my smock, the pain was so bad. But now it's all right. Do you remember the time when I came into your room and looked at myself in your glass, and the day when I found you by the Lark's Field? So many birds were singing! It's not so very long ago."

***

"Look, I can't cheat you. I have a letter for you in my pocket. I've had it since yesterday. I was asked to post it, but I didn't. I didn't want you to get it. But you might be angry with me when we meet again. Because we shall all meet again, shan't we? Take your letter."

With a convulsive movement she seized Marius's hand with her own injured one, but without seeming to feel the pain, and guided it to her pocket.

"Take it," she said.

Marius took out the letter, and she made a little gesture of satisfaction and acceptance.

"Now you must promise me something for my trouble..." She paused.

"What?" asked Marius.

"Do you promise?"

"Yes, I promise."

"You must kiss me on the forehead after I'm dead... I shall know."

She let her head fall back on his knees; her lids fluttered, and then she was motionless. He thought that the sad soul had left her. But then, when he thought it was over, she slowly opened her eyes that were now deep with the shadow of death, and said in a voice so sweet that it seemed already to come from another world:

"You know, Monsieur Marius, I think I was a little bit in love with you."

She tried to smile, and died.

***

. . . sorry if that ruined "A Little Fall of Rain" for anyone. It's kind of a way different tone.

Sparkle: What's the name of this street anyway? It's like something out of fucking Pleasantville.
Raine: Mapleview Lanes...
Sparkle: *Laughs hysterically* That's hilarious! Mapleview Lanes!! Aghhhh! I love it. I just love these names of any development built from the sixties on? Like ahhh "Fairfield Estates" or Winchester woods or or Birchmeadow Crescent All Exclusive Lifestyle Living excluding the likes of us, right?
Raine: Sparkle. You changed the subject.
Sparkle: I know, let's colour our hair.

Edited 2013-03-18 22:59 (UTC)

"I care about whether I'm warm enough, or cool enough, or good-looking enough, or if my nails are looking raggy, or if Lewis touched me on the shoulder, or seemed to be looking at me, or if I want to get stoned, or my ass is itchy or I want to eat or if Lewis thinks I'm funny but I don't care about anything. Like when I see those black and white films on educational TV about the Nazis emptying truckloads of bodies into ditches, or Huts and the Tutsis in Rwanda and those people, those ordinary people who like turned on their neighbours, and their best friends, and their sisters and brothers and even their mothers hacking off their hands and feet, shooting old women who are on their knees begging begging for the lives of their grandchildren I look at their faces and I see my own face." *He lights a sparkler and watches it burn out*

And the scene that breaks my heart every time....

---

MARGARET and SPARKLE.
There is a loud crash. SPARKLE destroys things in MARGARET's house.

Sparkle: Well... hello... Dolly, well hello... Dolly it's so nice to have you back where you belong... You're looking swell Dolly... I can tell Dolly...

SPARKLE laughs until he falls down.

Margaret: What do you want from me? Who are you? Are you from the group home?

Sparkle: You! You have broken my best friend's heart!

Margaret: What?

Sparkle: I love my friend do you understand?

Margaret: Are you talking about Raine? That I have somehow--

Sparkle: You bitch! You old saggy ugly mean rich fucking bitch!! Do you know how we hate you? We the writhing seething K-Mart masses, who mow your lawns and clean your floors and do your hair and your nails and sew your hems we detest you. Oh my God my GOD you have no idea what you have done. YOU HAVE BROKEN MY BEST FRIEND'S HEART!!

SPARKLE falls to the ground before MARGARET, crying, hugging her ankles-- MARGARET is stricken with true guilt.

Edited 2013-03-18 23:18 (UTC)

. . . why I have not yet partaken of your canon, I have NO IDEA. I should fix that.

It's probably easily enough located on Amazon!

That's ALL THE ENABLING I NEED. *goes*

YAAAAAY!

"I always thought my first sunrise would have tequila in it."

"Zombies don't text!"

"Witnesses can be a bitch."

Hanna: "Things just went from worse to worser."
Spencer: "That's not a word, but continue."

"I have no problem opening a can of whoop-ass on that woman."

Aria: "'Unable are the loved to die for love is immortality.'"
Hanna: "That's creepy."
Aria: "It's Emily Dickinson."
Hanna: "I don't care if it's Santa Claus, considered me creeped."

Meme: Quotes

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