meme: sexytimes roundup!

[throughaphase]

It's been since November since we did this and the coffee shop AU alone probably warrants this today, so let's see how much herpes all our kids should have! In the words of seaweed_demigod:

Basically you write down who your character has gotten it on with during their time in Fandom. Like so:

Lois Lane
Kissed: Chuck Bass, Hannibal King, Prince Edward, Priestly, Adora, Rikku, Mat Cauthon
Slept With: Chuck Bass, Hannibal King, Katchoo

LOIS LANE IS THE EXAMPLE THAT WILL NEVER DIE. Anyway. This is basically kissing and telling (possessed/AU/Fandom-weirdness totally counts!) in list form so we all can giggle and laugh and facepalm and have some fun on this Monday morning. Some people suggested adding additional categories for things that might not fit in the two listed above (faded to black with, married, drained the blood of, etc etc) so feel free to do that!

Comments

[robinonadderall]

Stiles Stilinski

Kissed: Natalie Adams, Heather (canon), Derek Hale (SOW, 20 year reunion, Fangirl BDE)
Felt Up: Eric Northman (SOW)
Slept with but is trying to convince himself it didn't count: Derek Hale (20 year reunion, Fangirl BDE)
Actually slept with: Nobody. Absolutely no one. Because it didn't count.

Also Carl the demon was inside him so...

[whenshewasnice]

Natalie V. Adams
Kissed: Sam LaCroix, Peter Wiggin, Stiles Stilinski, Jim Kirk
Slept With: Sam LaCroix, Peter Wiggin, Jim Kirk

Lol sorry, Stiles, you are the fail in Natalie's efforts to be consistent between the two categories.

[robinonadderall]

Natalie probably saved herself a horribly awkward sexual encounter. That might have ended with her death, seeing what happened to Heather.

[bitten_notshy]

I love how I have three relatively vanilla lists and then Jack.

Bay Kennish
Kissed: Cade, Jim Kirk, Gert Yorkes
Slept with: Jim Kirk

Jack Priest
Kissed: Tony Foster, Rose Hathaway, Ronan Nolan, Emma Frost, Sebastien de Ulloa (canon), Merlin (SOW), Priestly (love spell), Elena, Karla
Slept With: Tony Foster, Rose Hathaway, Ronan Nolan, Sebastien de Ulloa (canon), Emma Frost,
Bit : Kate Gregson (SOW)
Had Sexy Vampy Funtiems with: Jessica Hamby (SOW)
Had his sexual energy drained by: Bo (Umbridgeverse)
Played "vigorous werewolf Monopoly" with: Derek Hale (SOW, Fangirl BDE)
Had AU kid with: Kaidan Alenko

Tara Maclay
Kissed: Diana Hansen, Raven, Karla, Kennedy, Jono Starsmore (SOW), Rebecca Logan
Slept with: Kennedy, Jono Starsmore(SOW), Rebecca Logan

Victor Mancha
Kissed/Slept with: Olive Penderghast, Tony Stark (Fangirl BDE)

[throughaphase]

Kitty Pryde
Kissed: Peter Rasputin (canon), Pete Wisom (canon), Guy Gardner (assumedly!, sex pollen), Clint Barton
Slept with: Pete Wisdom (canon), Guy Gardner (sex pollen), Clint Barton

Jaina Solo
Kissed: John Sheppard, Chuck Bass (SOW), Brooke Davis (SOW), Dimitri Belikov (SOW), Zekk (canon), Jag Fel (canon), Eric Northman, Howard Stark (SOW), Kennedy (SOW), Tony Stark (SOW)
Slept with: John Sheppard, Dimitri Belikov (SOW), Jagged Fel (canon), Eric Northman, Howard Stark (SOW), Kennedy (SOW)

Annie Edison
Kissed: Luke Castellan (SOW, kissing booth), Butters Stoch (kissing booth, sex pollen), Tony Stark (I ASSUME, Reality TV Weekend), Vaughn (canon), Jeff Winger (canon)
Slept with: Her gay ex-boyfriend, Tony Stark (Reality TV weekend), Butters Stotch (sex pollen)

Jaye Tyler
Kissed: Archie Kennedy, Cameron Mitchell, Angela Chase (StB), Parker (StB), Jack Harkness, Alec, Rory Gilmore, Eric Weiss, Seely Booth (kissing booth), Chloe Sullivan (kissing booth), Jarod, Jake Doyle (sex pollen), John Constantine (I assume, sex pollen), Dean Winchester (I also assume, sex pollen)
Slept With: Archie Kennedy, Cameron Mitchell, Jack Harkness, Alec, Jake Doyle (sex pollen), John Constantine (sex pollen), Dean Winchester (sex pollen)

Marasiah Fel
Kissed: Atton Rand (sex pollen)
Slept with: Nope!

Maddie Berry
Kissed: Loki Laufeyson (sex pollen), Kenzi
Slept with: Loki Laufeyson (sex pollen)

Cordelia Chase
Kissed: Xander Harris (canon)
Slept with: Nope!

[abakingmetaphor.livejournal.com]

Buffy Summers

Kissed: A whole bunch of people in canon, Dean Winchester
Slept with: Angel (canon), Parker Abrams (canon), Riley Finn (canon), Spike (canon), Dean Winchester

[filleauloup]

Éponine Thénardier
Kissed: Montparnasse (canon), Dean Winchester (sex pollen week), Samantha Traynor (presumably, gremlin bite), Frank Abagnale (fangirl BDE)
Slept With: Montparnasse (canon), Dean Winchester (sex pollen week), Samantha Traynor (gremlin bite), Frank Abagnale (FTB-ily, fangirl BDE)
Is slightly bitter about but mostly resigned to: these things only happening to her when Fandom's being weird. Well, not Montparnasse.

[wrongkindofsith]

Cara

Kissed: Lots of people in canon, Clark Kent, Dahlia (NPC - Dead Loved Ones), Bruce Wayne, Butters Scotch (Kissing Booth), Rose Hathaway (Kissing Booth), Bo (Umbridge-verse), Surreal SaDiablo
Tasted the Dangerous Sexy Coffee Breath of: Derek Hale (Fangirl BDE)
Slept With: Lots of people in canon, Clark, Dahlia, Bruce, Surreal
Swooned at, then Made Sweet Tender Love to: Surreal (Fangirl BDE)
Hit on then kicked ass of as prelude to robbing: Jim Kirk (SOW)

[shippedtomaine]

Emma Swan

Kissed: No one!
Slept With: No one!

[failsatspirit]

Korra

Kissed: Mako (canon), Jackson Whittemore (sex pollen)
Slept With: Jackson Whittemore (sex pollen)

[pursuedthestars]

Jim Kirk

Kissed: Natalie Adams, Bay Kennish, Karolina Dean (SOW), Gertrude Yorkes
Slept With: Natalie Adams, Bay Kennish, Kaorlina Dean (SOW)
Got Seduced and then Slammed by: Cara

Sam LaCroix

Kissed: Natalie Adams
Slept With: Natalie Adams

Percy Jackson

Kissed: Luke Castellan
Slept With: Luke Castellan

Nobody Owens

Kissed: Kate Gregson, Caroline Forbes
Slept With: Kate Gregson, Caroline Forbes

[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

Bruce Wayne:
Kissed: Jean Grey, Ariel, Crystal Amaquelin, Brittany Pierce, Zatanna Zatarra, Rinoa Heartily, Jessica Hamby, Caroline Forbes, Alex Russo, Hanna Martin, Dana Scully, Lucrezia Borgia, Cara, Ramona Flowers, Cassidy of Dharo, Rebecca Logan, Kate Daniels, Darcy Lewis, Britta Perry, Juliet Darling (Umbridgeverse), Karolina Dean (SOW), Emily Thorne. Kissing booth: Kate Gregson, Chloe Saunders, Leia Organa, Azula, Ellie Bartowski, Hoshi Sato, Emma Frost, Quinn Fabray, George Lass, Rosella of Daventry
Slept with: Jean Grey, Ariel, Zatanna Zatarra, Jessica Hamby, Dana Scully, Lucrezia Borgia, Cara, Ramona Flowers, Rebecca Logan, Kate Daniels, Hanna Martin, Darcy Lewis, Britta Perry, Karolina Dean (SOW), Emily Thorne, Quinn Fabray (Fans)
Kissed on the cheek by: That strumpet, Rilla Blythe

Zayne Carrick:
Kissed: Sookie Stackhouse, Dinah Lance, Myria Le Jean, Guy Gardner, Yakko Warner
Slept with: Nope. Forever alone!

Jessica Drew:
Kissed: For the record, I'm doing this at work on lunch and can't double check easily, but I believe it's just Cade and Loki
Slept with: Cade

Mira:
Kissed: Presumably Cade
Slept with: Definitely Cade

[throughaphase]

Damn, Bruce. I'm impressed.

[batwaffles.livejournal.com]

. . .

oh my god, Boss.

O.O

[craftyladyparts.livejournal.com]

Things to note for Bruce:

1) This doesn't count canon or even Andrea, who at least got adapted into the game but never so much as set foot in Fandom. Otherwise I'd be adding several more, most of them villains, one of them a sidekick, and one AU version of the forever sample, Lois Lane.

2) Only three names have been added to each list since Bruce graduated.

3) He's also been married multiple times, but most of those were SOW and the real one was a plant monster in canon.

Goddamn, Batman.

[nookiepowered]

Copypasta with red sauce!

Xander Harris Carson
Kissed, in more or less chronological order: Cordelia Chase (canon + FH Cordy 2.0: Spin the Bottle), Willow Rosenberg (canon + FH Willow 2.0: AU Weekend), Faith Lehane (canon), Veruca Cally Tyrol (Homecoming 2005), Duo Maxwell (StB), Peter Parker (StB), M. Parker, Marty Blank (6th Floor Room of Boykissy), Hamlet (6th Floor Room of Boykissy), Bridge Carson, Demyx (StB), Chloe Sullivan (StB), Sam Anders, Rory Gilmore/Becky-the-Hooker (AU weekend)
Got a lapdance from: Veronica Mars
Slept with: Faith Lehane (canon and post-FH), Bridge Carson, Larry Blaisdell (post-FH), M. Parker (AU!Kid!verse/Wishverse)
Held Hands With: John Crichton (Robots Suck!), Lee Adama 1.0 (...he got stuck in a closet)
Groped accidentally and/or for ART: Lee Adama 1.0 (FOR ART), Marty Blank (accidentally), Angela Chase (accidentally and FOR ART)

Bo
Kissed: Kyle (canon - first boyfriend, first kill), lots and lots of people some of whom survived (canon and Umbridgeverse), John Mitchell, Shunsui Kyōraku (presumably, since they had offscreen sexxorz and kissing is part of the succubus gig), Eric Northman, Tiny, Tino (It's not gay if it's in a 3-way.) Kate Gregson (to knock out vamp!Kate), almost certainly Guy Gardner, Jake Doyle, the dude at J,GoB, the girl at the Perk, Apu (Sorry, Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilon), Fosse (DON'T YOU DARE JUDGE HER), Cindy Perreault, Hercules, HER MOTHER (In Bo's defense? She didn't and still doesn't know that Saskia is her mother. Unlike, oh...SASKIA.), Cara (Umbridgeverse), Derek Hale (Teenage adults and Sex Pollen), Dyson (canon catch-up)
Slept with: Kyle (canon - first boyfriend, first kill), lots and lots of people most/all of whom didn't survive (canon), Shunsui Kyōraku, John Mitchell and Eric Northman (together), John Mitchell (by himselfs), Eric Northman (by himselfs), Guy Gardner (Green Lantern Corps Interruptus), Fosse (DON'T YOU DARE JUDGE HER), Tiny's sister Bitsy, Derek Hale (Teenage adults and Sex Pollen), Superman (implied, 20 Year Reunion)
Did something sexual with that may or may not have progressed all the way to traditional sex:
Isabela, Jake Doyle, Cindy Perreault, Hercules, The Portalocity Dude (NOT TRICK. SHE HAD PHONE SEX WITH THE GUY SHE ORDERED HER PORTAL FROM. NOT TRICK. IN CONCLUSION, NOT TRICK. WHO IS HER GRANDFATHER.)
Had inappropriately sexual business relations with: Audrey Parker.
Drained the sexual energy from without actually sexx0ring: Jack Priest (Umbridgeverse)
Woke up in bed with: A horse (daemons)
Danced lovingly with an enchanted photo of: Dolores Umbridge

Mavis Dracula
Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...

[doubleohblonde]

James Bond

Kissed: Vesper (NPC - Nemesis Island), Deadpool, Daisy Day.
Slept With: Vesper, Deadpool, Daisy Day
Had his virtue threatened by: Kara the fangirl (Fangirl BDE)

[flickofthewrist]

Flick

Kissed: Joi (canon)
Slept With: Joi (canon)

He's a little too new to have much of a list.

[walkswithcoyote]

Mercy Thompson

Kissed: Samuel(in canon), no one at FH - at least, not that I remember.
Slept With: No one
Faded to Black Before Kissing Tony Stark(Reality TV weekend)