meme: quotes!

[fates_jaye]

We have not done this meme since May 2011, so it's as good a time as any to bring it back out again, right? With all our new snarky characters since then and new books that some of us might have gotten in those 10 months that demand to be quoted...

Am I stealing this bit from weetuskenraider? Idek at this point.
Here's how this works: tag in (under the appropriate journal) with canon quotes from your characters. No (or little) context, just the quotes -- individually if you want, or several in one comment.

People can tag in to those threads and either guess the context/situation, or ask you what it's about, or just comment on the quotes. This way we can all have a little amusement, dork about our canon a little, and maybe get in a little canon pimping on the side.

As always, don't forget to keep checking in and see what new stuff's gone up!

Comments

[endsthegame]

Petra: "There's a stone wall around you and those words you just said are some of the bricks."
Ender: "Bricks in a stone wall?"
Petra: "So you are listening! Ender, I'm not trying to violate your privacy. Keep it all in. Whatever it is."
Ender: "I'm not keeping anything in. I don't have any secrets. My whole life is on the nets, it belongs to the human race now, and I'm really not that worried about it. It's like I don't even live in my body. Just in my mind."

On the third day of his walk-through of the ship that would carry him and his colonists, Ender was so tired of phony nautical terminology transferred to starships that he found himself making sarcastic remarks. Fortunately, he didn't actually say them, he only thought them. Do we swab the decks, matey? Will the bosun pipe us aboard? How many degrees will she tack into the wind, sir?

Ender: "I see that all of that is funny, if you look at it that way. I was too busy to be amused with it. I was just trying to stay awake and say all the right things."
Val: "So what were you laughing at?"
Ender: "It was pure delight. Delight and relief. I'm not in charge of anything now. For the duration of the voyage, it's Morgan's ship, and I'm a free man for the first time in my life."
Val: "Man? You're still shorter than me."
Ender: "But Val, I have to shave every week now, or the whiskers show."

Ender: "I'm meeting with the captain of the ship, at his request."
Admiral Morgan: "Sir."
Ender: "Oh, you don't need to call me sir. Andrew will do. I don't like to insist on the privileges of rank."

[vanillajello]

"And in the event of a water landing, you're probably going to be like, 'why is there water between Kansas City and Tulsa?' It could happen. You should exit in an orderly fashion."

"I have lost something, Mom. Three months ago, I was hot and young. Weird Israeli dudes would propose to me every time I walked by Radio Shack. And now... Am I old? Have I rotted?"

"We should just keep it super casual."
"I am so glad you said that. ... And does 'super casual' –– that means that we're like khakis, or... jean shorts?"
"Well, like –– like, those weird calf-length shorts Kevin Smith wears?"
"Jorts?"
"Yeah. We're jorts."

[zetabetabrat.livejournal.com]

Kiki: [Showing off her wedding ring] Four carats. D-color. Flawless. It's no big thing.
Rebecca: I read in my psychology class that men who spend large amounts of money on their women are overcompensating for their small--
Casey: --and this is Rebecca!

Rebecca: Do you know who I am?
Girl: Yes!
Rebecca: Well, I have no idea who you are. Leave.

Ashleigh: I know what your problem is.
Rebecca: I'm too hot?

Casey: [Yelling to an entire party] Hey! Who wants to see Rebecca's boobs?
[General murmur of disinterest]
Rebecca: Hey! My boobs are awesome!

[zetabetabrat.livejournal.com]

Rebecca: Sorry, Case, but I'm here to stay, so maybe you should get over it. And then get your roots done.
[Later]
Rebecca: I'm sorry about your roots.
Casey: Oh, that's okay, I know you didn't mean it --
Rebecca: No, I mean I'm sorry about them. You could use a little touch-up.

Rebecca: Not having a boyfriend is nothing to get yourself upset about, Casey. You don't need a man to have a fulfilling life. You could be the next Mother Teresa or... Rosie O'Donnell!

Rebecca: I want you to know that I rarely try to sleep with the same ex twice.

Rusty: [to Cappie] It's this girl Tina. She's relentless. She's constantly disagreeing, taking the opposite position, saying these really annoying things in this... gratingly reasonable tone... she has this chestnut-brown hair, this all-innocent smile, these amazingly intense eyes that just lock onto you like she's trying to bend a spoon. She wears this kind of hypnotic perfume--
Rebecca: Oh my god, just have sex with her already! [to Cappie] I'm about to puke.

Rebecca: I'm sorry for being mean to you. And for making you run all my errands. And for calling you the first mentally-challenged engineering major.
Rusty: Polymer science.
Rebecca: Hence the apology.

Evan: I gave up my trust fund.
Rebecca: What the hell is wrong with you, are you an idiot? Oh my god. You're poor!

Rebecca: You invited Evan but not me?
Casey: I assumed you wouldn't want to go. Would you?
Rebecca: I would, thank you for the invite.

[richieryan.livejournal.com]

Mac: Did you finish those invoices?
Richie: Not yet...
Mac: What've you been doing?
Richie: I've been busy.
Mac: [mockingly] You've been busy?
Richie: [returns mock] Yeah, I've been busy.
Mac: You know what I think? I think you've got too much time on your hands, I think you need to spend a little time in jail.
Richie: Jail? Whoa whoa whoa! What for? For assault with a paper airplane? For littering in your office?

Richie: Amanda found out where you were.
Mac: What do you mean "she found out?"
Richie: I didn't mean to tell her, Mac, but she started talking and doing things to me ... well, I didn't stand a chance.
Mac: You wouldn't be the first.


Tessa: If they were after us, they're after him.
Richie: Well, then, we've got to go warn him.
Tessa: How? We don't know where he is.
Richie: This is just great. Just great. I mean, he's there, they're there, we're here, nobody's anywhere.
Tessa: Did you ever think of running for Congress?


Mac: My father couldn't grasp what had happened
Richie: Who could? Man, he must have freaked. I mean, there you were all of a sudden on your feet again. A zombie in a kilt.


"When I was a kid, I made up a story that my dad was this foreign spy on a dangerous mission, that he was doing some kind of work behind the Iron Curtain or something, and that's why he could never just put in a collect call and say 'I want to talk to my son, Richie Ryan, the all American boy'."

"You know, I used to stay up at night wondering. Thinking that there must be some special thing I'm supposed to do with my life because I'm Immortal. And I had this illusion that because you were my teacher, that you would show me what it was. And you did. I got it now. There can be only one."

"Cut off my head? You don't think that's a little extreme for petty theft?"

"She drugged me, kidnapped me, tied me to a bed. If you ask me, that's a pretty solid foundation for a relationship."

"I didn't ask for help because it takes a while to develop that ask-for-help reflex, OK?"

"Yeah, I -- I . . . I didn't ask you for help because it, like, it-it takes a while to develop that "ask for help" reflex, okay?"

[whenshewasnice]

I don't have the patience to transcribe too many comics quotes right now, so I'll just leave you with one of my favourite Envy lines:

"Squish squish squishy squish squish!!"

Yep.

[exactlyaverage.livejournal.com]

Stark: Good job Carter. Wow that didn't even leave a bad taste in my mouth.
Carter: Give it a second.
Stark: Oh there it is.

Note: Out of context it sounds a lot dirtier than it actually is.

Dr. Witicus: It's been building since last night. It is an incredibly dangerous confluence of meteorological events.
Carter: Uhh?
Henry: A perfect storm.
Carter: Thank you.
Dr. Witicus: A spinning cyclone of instability. High up in the cryosphere.
Henry: Ice funnel of death.
Carter: Gotcha. Why don't you people just say 'ice funnel of death'?

Sheriff Cobb: That was Ned Carver. He claims aliens have abducted some of his cattle again.
Jo: Tell him to call me when they move on to anal probes. Wait, um, that didn’t come out right.

Henry: Do you remember Occam's Razor?
Carter: uh..."Simple things are true"?
Henry: Close enough.

Jack Carter: I figured it all out. I know what you're up to.
Jason Anderson: In regards to...?
Jack Carter: I know that you have a device that can...create a wormhole, or, uh, bend time, or make you invisible...or a wormholing, time-bending, invisibling device, that shields you from the mind.
Nathan Stark: Yes, he said "invisibling".